#YouAreLoved at #TheFeast Let’s just call him Mr. Prince Charming. I met him in a free training on web development. We were seatmates and teammates, and I always assisted him in our project for that two-week course. Needless to say, we became good friends. As I got to know more of him, I noticed his humility and good heart. I could not help it, I started having a huge crush on him. After the training, our communication continued through texts and emails. No courting happened though as our topics focused mainly on spirituality. Actually, he was also the one who inspired me to attend The Feast. When I received my Novena to God’s Love as a first-time attendee, one of the prayers I wrote was to find a husband with the following traits: — God-loving person — hardworking — patient — understanding — kind Eventually, I inserted Mr. Prince Charming’s name in my novena booklet. Hehe. God’s answer to my prayers came one Sunday during a Feast session. The Mass was about to start, but a female friend of mine had not arrived yet. My head would turn to the entrance door from time to time, expecting her. But my heart skipped a beat when instead of my female friend, it was Mr. Prince Charming who appeared! He looked more handsome than the last time we met. He also had a better physique, almost ala-Derek Ramsey. I almost swooned! After two years, I saw him again at The Feast, the very place where I started praying for him. What else could this mean? I was about to sing praises of joy to heaven for answering one of my prayers, when I noticed he was with a girl. Not just any girl, but a girlfriend basing on their sweetness. Ooops… The magical scene turned into a heartbreaking reality. I was feeling totally lost during the Mass as I was focused on them. I was seated near enough where I could see but far enough where they could not notice me. Silently, I prayed, "God, I am not ready to talk to him now. Seeing him is more than enough." Just a few minutes after that prayer, Mr. Prince Charming and his girlfriend left the venue. I wanted to question God for not answering my prayers exactly the way I wanted it, but I was still thankful He saved me from that awkward moment. What more, He also consoled me through the talk that day: “Why are some of our prayers NOT granted?” “Because God wants us to receive what is best for us.” I proved this to be true when I met my husband in a business seminar a year after that incident. Looking back and looking at my husband, I am grateful to God for quickly answering my prayer about Mr. Prince Charming. Although the answer was a big and resounding “NO,” He still gave me a husband with all the traits I prayed for—God-loving, hardworking, patient, understanding, kind—along with other

#YouAreLoved at #TheFeast We live in the province, while my father works in Makati. And though our family is not wealthy, neither are we poor. All is well. Or so I thought. Until I learned of my father’s unbelievably huge debt. OUR FINANCIAL STRUGGLES I transferred to another school at the cost of giving up what I really wanted to pursue. I even started working and living independently right when I turned eighteen. That was one less responsibility out of the house, so I thought it would improve our finances. I was wrong. Albeit ashamed, my parents would ask me to cover some expenses even after I had sent a portion of my salary. I did not mind giving more. What bothered me was the fact that our situation was not getting any better. It came to a point when my father could no longer send financial support. He said he was paying debts, kesyo na-hold up—he gave one reason or another. This went on for months. God is good that I was able to work from home and stay with my family. With my measly salary, I provided for food, though my mother and I would often skip meals so my siblings could eat. Sometimes, with an empty table, all we could do was cry ourselves to sleep. Eventually, my father resumed his financial support. I decided to move to the metro where I can work and study at the same time. I even got a job near his office. Finally, things were going our way. Until my father stopped supporting my family. Again. DISCOVERING MY FATHER'S DARK SECRET They tried to contact him, but he could not be reached. Suddenly, things I had ignored through the years started flashing in my mind. My hunch—or that which we Filipinos call ”kutob”—was so strong I could not fight it anymore. It was December 2010 when I rushed to his office to confront him. In tears, I nervously demanded for answers which I really did not want to hear. He denied having another family or another woman. But he could not answer when I asked if there was another... “man.” To say I was broken is an understatement. I remembered how much I had sacrificed that even my personal life was affected. My mother even tried to keep the problems to herself and helped him with his debts, only to find out the real reason behind it. We spent a lot of nights sleeping with an empty stomach—while he wasted a lot of money supporting someone else! Hearing the news, my mother and siblings went all the way from the province to find him, but he had disappeared. We could no longer contact him. Came Christmas Day, we were surprised that my aunt (his sister) had him come home, so we were forced to face each other. He apologized, but I felt it was done merely out of obligation. My anger ate me up that I cursed him through text messages. I

#YouAreLoved at #TheFeast May tao akong hindi mapatawad eh. Sobrang baba at sama ng tingin ko sa kanya. Wala siyang kuwenta. Sobrang dumi. Galit ako kasi ganon s’ya. Naiinis ako kasi lagi niyang sinasaktan ‘yung sarili niya. Nito lang, gigilitan na niya sarili niya, kaso nakatulog. Lasing na lasing kasi. Someone ruined her childhood. Siguro mga 5 to 7 years old siya noon. Malayong pinsan niya. Lagi kasi siyang naiiwan sa bahay ng mga ‘yun. Ilang beses naulit. I hate her for not fighting. REVIVED I was invited to join the Love Life Retreat ng Feast Singles last year pa. Pero I always refused to. Dumating pa sa point na tinataguan ko ‘yung friends kong nag-i-invite sa ‘kin. (Sorry, guys! ?) Ang thinking ko: "Ano ba ‘yang LLR na ‘yan? Ang mahal, tapos two days lang." Then this year came. ‘Yung friends ko, servants. So I felt safe. (Friendly ako, pero takot din kasi akong makipag-socialize. Takot ako sa judgment ng tao.) Na try ko lang kaya? Baka naman... Baka kasi okay naman? Ewan ko ba, pagdating pa lang ng retreat house, may kakaiba na akong feeling. So I prayed for guidance, for renewal, for God to fill my heart sa emptiness na nafi-feel ko. Na tulungan Niya akong i-surrender kahit noon lang ‘yung mga bagaheng dala-dala ko. (That was the only time na nag-pray ako ulit kay God nang sincere.) And the whole retreat had been a roller coaster ride for me. I got scared kasi ‘di ko alam kung ano ba talaga’ng mangyayari. I sought His help, pero I knew it was on me. Na ako lang naman talaga ang magde-decide kung io-open ko ‘yung puso ko sa Kaniya. Hindi pa man ako nakakalabas ng retreat house, I knew my life has been changed. ‘Yung feeling na hindi ko pa nararamdaman sa buong buhay ko. Parang ano eh, ako ‘yung lifeline na dumating na sa straight line. Pero dahil ginusto ko pang lumaban, na-revive ako. SET FREE At itong susunod kong sasabihin, it's a testimony of how I encountered God in that retreat. ‘Yung taong hindi ko mapatawad, ngayon napatawad ko na. Oo, NAPATAWAD KO NA ‘YUNG SARILI KO. Pinatawad ko na ‘yung sarili ko, kasi pinatawad na Niya ako. I felt Him tapping my back while whispering na, "Anak, patawarin mo na ‘yung sarili mo. Mahal kita kahit ano pa’ng nagawa mo." Naramdaman kong gumaan ‘yung puso ko kasabay ng bawat patak ng luha ko. Na-feel kong sa wakas, lumaya na ako sa rehas ng nakaraan ko. I don't know if it was rape. Pero he was always touching—. He told me na kahit magsumbong ako, walang maniniwala. Alam kong hindi ako galit sa taong ‘yun. Pinagdasal ko pa ngang ‘wag na sana niyang ulitin sa iba. Na sana hindi na ‘to mangyari pa sa iba. Pero sa tuwing maaalala ko, masakit. Sobrang sakit na bakit kaya sa dinami-dami ng bata, ako pa ‘yung nakaranas. Pero other part of me, mas mabuti palang ako na lang kaysa sa ibang

#YouAreLoved at #TheFeast NBSB. No boyfriend since birth sa edad na 29 years old. Iyan ako. Taon-taon sa reunion, hindi mawawala ang tatanungin ng mga tito at tita ko kung may “boyfriend” na raw ba ako. Simula college hanggang sa ngayong nagtratrabaho na ako, iisa pa rin ang sagot ko: WALA. Gusto ko na ngang sabihin sa kanila, “Manliligaw nga wala, boyfriend pa kaya?” Ilang ulit ko na ring naririnig ang, “Ang ganda mo kaya. Bakit wala ka pang boyfriend?” Sa isip-isip ko tuloy, “Talaga bang maganda ako? Kasi parang hindi naman iyon nakikita ng iba.” At ang madalas pang magbigay ng mga compliment sa akin ay ang “Titas of Manila.” Kaya sa aking palagay, hindi naman totoo. Sino ba kasi’ng magkakagusto sa akin? Iyan ang naging mindset ko sa loob ng mahabang panahon. Ang totoo niyan, dumating na sa puntong hindi na ako umaasang magkaka-boyfriend pa ako. Sabi pa ng aking nanay, sama-sama raw kaming magpipinsang tatandang dalaga. Para sa akin, wala namang mali roon. Siguro nag-aalala lang talaga ang nanay ko kung wala akong makakatuwang sa buhay. Pero naisip ko, magkakaroon nga ako ng katuwang sa buhay, pero hindi naman pala talaga siya nararapat para sa akin, bakit ko pa pipilitin? Ayaw kong madaliin ang pagbuo ng isang pamilya, ni ang pagpili ng magiging BF. Maigi na nga lang maging single kaysa sa dumating ang panahong pagsisihan ko pa. Mamaya, sa kamamadali ko, ang mahanap at mapili ko pang maging katuwang ay hindi naman pala ayon sa non-negotiables ko. O kaya ‘yung kaugali ng tatay ko. Hindi naman sa hindi ko mahal ang tatay ko, pero hindi kaugali ng tatay ko ang ibig kong makasama habambuhay. Kaya hangga’t maaari, iniingatan ko rin ang aking puso. Bilin na bilin ng nanay ko, huwag na huwag akong pipili ng kaugali ng tatay ko. Ang bilin na ito ang hinding-hindi ko kakalimutan. Pero napapaisip pa rin ako. Kasi ang totoo niyan, gusto kong magkaroon ng sarili kong pamilya. Minsan, umaandar ang pagka-hopeless romantic ko. Aba, pangarap kong kung sino ang first BF ko ay siya na rin ang mapapangasawa ko. Eh paano nga naman iyon mangyayari, ‘di ba? Wala nga akong boyfriend? Kaya hinding-hindi maipagkakailang kinakabahan na rin ako. Lalo pa at tumatakbo ang oras at mukhang ako’y napag-iiwanan na. Karamihan sa mga classmate ko noong high school at college ay may kanya-kanya nang pamilya. May mga successful sa pagbuo ng pamilya, may ilan namang hindi. Kaya naman sabi ko sa sarili ko, “Ayos lang. Take your time. Hindi pa siguro oras ngayon.” Ngunit darating at darating ang panahon na gugustuhin mong kilalanin pa ang sarili mo. Nabigyan ako ng pagkakataon kamakailan dahil sa Love Life Retreat ng Feast Singles. Lahat ng mga itinatagong sakit at pilit ibinabaong mga alaala ay paunti-unting sinusubukang hilumin sa pamamagitan ng pagtanggap sa wagas na pagmamahal ni God. Doon ko napagtanto na ang pagmamahal Niya lang ang makagagamot sa lahat ng sugat at sakit. Dapat hayaan mong mag-overflow lang ang love Niya para lahat ng nakasasakit

#YouAreLoved at #TheFeast Natuto akong magtago. Magtago ng pinagdadaanan. Nang nararamdaman. Nang sakit. Nang galit. Nang takot. Na sa kabila ng mga ngiti, may dinadalang napakasakit na sugat galing sa nakaraan na hirap akong pakawalan. It all started 10 years ago. My cousin died. ‘Yung pinaka-close kong pinsan. So nag-stay kami ng kapatid ko in our aunt’s house for a few weeks until she recovered from the loss. But while she was recovering from pain, the pain in me started to build. During my stay there, I was abused by my uncle (‘yung asawa ng kapatid ni Papa). Walang nakakaalam. Walang nakakakita. Walang nakakaramdam. Sa tuwing lalapitan niya ‘ko, palalabasin niya lahat ng tao sa bahay na ‘yon. Kunwari may ipabibili siya. Pero kapag gusto kong sumama sa mga pinsan ko, ‘wag na raw. Maiwan na lang daw ako. Kahit bata pa ‘ko noon, alam ko nang hindi tama ‘yung ginagawa niya. Awa ni Lord, hindi naman umabot sa point na may nagawa na talaga siya sa akin. Pero isang gabi na tabi-tabi kaming lahat natulog, no choice ako kundi sa tabi na lang niya pumuwesto. Something almost happened. Buti nakatakbo ako papunta sa CR. At doon umiyak ng umiyak. Kinabukasan, bago pa siya makauwi galing work, tumakbo ako pauwi ng bahay. Ilang kilometro akong nagtatakbo. Takot na takot na para bang ayoko nang makita ulit ‘yung bahay na ‘yon. Nagulat si Mommy na umuwi akong mag-isa. Nung tinanong niya ako kung bakit, ang sagot ko, “Wala.” Natatakot ako na baka kung ano’ng magawa ng parents ko, especially ng father ko, 'pag nalaman nila kung ano’ng nangyari sa akin. So I shut my mouth. 2012. Sumali ako sa isang organization for the youth. Nakilala ko si Lord. Nalaman ko kung ano ‘yung pakiramdam ng nagwo-worship. Doon, naramdaman ko ‘yung comfort ng yakap Niya. Doon ako unang nag-yes sa Kanya. Pero since malayo ‘yung biyahe, napagod din ako agad. Nawala. Nakipag-break. A year after that, niligawan ako ulit ni Lord through choir. Sumali ako ng choir sa parish malapit sa amin. Maayos ‘yung service ko sa simula. Pero ‘di nagtagal, hindi na ‘ko ulit makabalik. Why? Because I was, again, molested inside the parish. Hindi naman ulit umabot sa point na may nagawa siya. Pero knowing na nangyayari ‘yun sa loob pa mismo ng simbahan, kung saan akala ko safe ako. Hindi pala. It made me hate parish. It built anger, unforgiveness, hatred, and fear inside me. Again, I remained silent lalo na sa loob ng bahay. Wala silang alam sa mga nangyari. Masakit, knowing na ‘yung mga tao mismo sa loob ng bahay namin ay hindi ako kilala. Ang alam nila, masungit at matapang lang ako. Hindi nila alam na nagpapakita ako ng lakas na wala naman talaga. Dahil sa loob ko, sobrang hina ko na kasi sobrang sakit na. Sobrang sakit kumapit mag-isa. For years, I was at the rock bottom of my life. 2014. I started attending the Feast. Naramdaman ko ulit ‘yung yakap ni Lord. The hug that

#YouAreLoved at #TheFeast Growing up, I had bullied and had been bullied as well. In high school, I participated in riots, got caught by the teacher cheating, slept or played “luksong baka” during classes, distributed pornographic materials and watched them with my “barkada,” drank alcoholic beverages inside and outside the campus on a regular basis, and the list goes on and on. LIVING YOLO Unlike some adolescents who became delinquents because of family problems, my case was different. My family has been very supportive all throughout my life. They taught me values, granted me understanding and forgiveness, extended financial help, and gave me all the love in the world. But as a teenager, I was greatly influenced by my “barkada.” They are rich, and I pretended to be like them to gain approval. So instead of doing something to improve myself, I got into the hobby of weaving white lies, eventually turning my whole life into a one big lie. I wasn’t able to pursue the things I really wanted because I was busy being someone else. Concepts remained concepts. Dreams remained dreams. I got older and older, but inside, I was still a child. My unscrupulous lifestyle continued until college, the intensity and magnitude of my curiosity and vices escalating. I went to parties all the time, flirted, and even slept with women. I even considered it a hobby offering romantic hope to women despite not really being interested. I chose DOTA over having good grades, tried marijuana, had Tinder dates, and stole money from my family numerous times. Again, the list goes on and on. I enjoyed the ride and lived in what millennials call YOLO. Then came payback time. NEAR-DEATH EXPERIENCE One night after work, my workmates and I had a drinking session in a bar with dim lights, dance floors, towers of beer and drinks, loud noise, and plenty of opportunities to know almost everybody. We had fun drinking, cursing our boss, dancing, flirting with girls. I was so drunk when I finally decided to go home. It was 4 AM. I was walking along the streets of Cubao on wobbly legs, just trusting my instinct. I don’t really know how I got into a bus which dropped me off some gas station along Monumento. I tried getting a taxi, but in my obvious drunken state, no one wanted to take me in. Worse, my vision faded and my burned-out body slowly collapsed on the pavement where cars drive through toward that gas station. Like a man possessed, I hysterically screamed and shouted for help. I didn’t care what people would think of me; my only concern was to survive. I have avoided death a couple of occasions in my life, but that was the worst/luckiest avoidance of death—I could’ve been run by a car, stabbed by dangerous strangers, or probably got into prison for causing a scandal. But yes, the latter part almost became true when a police officer dragged me to a safe place, waited

#YouAreLoved at #TheFeast Bata pa lang ako ay excited na akong magdalaga sa kadahilanang sabik na akong matagpuan ‘yung “true love” ko. Marahil sa kapapanood ko ng love stories sa TV kaya nagmamadali akong maramdaman ‘yung kilig na dala ng pagiging in love kuno. MALING MGA TAO, MALING PANAHON College na ako nang makilala ko ‘yung inakala ko na tamang “partner” para sa akin. Bakit kamo “partner”? Dahil hindi ito ‘yung normal na boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. Nang mga panahon na ‘yon, ang tawag sa kanila ay “T-bird. ” Yes, tomboy or lesbiyana kumbaga. Sa kanya ko kasi naramdaman ‘yung unang kilig at pagpapahalaga na inaasam ko. Kapag kasama ko siya, sobrang espesyal ko at nawawala ‘yung pananaw ng iba sa pinasok kong relasyon. Pero bago ako nagtapos ng kolehiyo ay natapos na rin ang aming relasyon. Yes, siya ang unang heartbreaker ko. Pagkatapos ng kolehiyo ay madami rin akong nakarelasyon. Habang palipat-lipat ako ng trabaho, patuloy rin akong naghahanap ng taong totoong magmamahal sa akin. Meron din akong mga nasaktan, pero madalas, ako ‘yung iniiwan. At every time, basag na basag ‘yung pakiramdam ko. Totoo pala ‘yung sinasabi ng iba na sa tuwing masasaktan sila ng taong mahal nila, parang tumitigil ‘yung mundo sa pag-ikot at tipong ayaw mo nang umusad ‘yung buhay mo. Pira-pirasong puso ang peg. MALING PAGMAMAHAL Eh kailan nga ba nagiging mali ang magmahal? Siguro ang sagot ko ay kapag mas madami kang masasaktan kaysa sa mapapasaya. Alam ko dahil makailang beses kong nagawa. Ewan kung dahil ba sa nagrebelde na ako sa idea ng “true love” o dahil sadyang curious lang akong malaman kung paano mahalin bilang isang “mistress” kahit sa maikling panahon lang. Nakakahiya dahil ito ‘yung mga panahong nagsisimula na akong maglingkod sa isang charismatic community sa pag-iisip na mababawasan ko kahit paano ang mga naging kasalanan ko. TRUE LOVE In my journey of finding my One True Love, I found out that I was searching in all the wrong places that’s why I was always picking the wrong person to enter my life. Nang pinahintulutan kong pumasok sa puso ko si Hesus, doon ko naramdaman ‘yung pagpapahalagang matagal kong hinanap. At sa sobrang kilig, napahagulgol ako ng iyak at binalot ng tuwa ang buong pagkatao ko na hindi ko akalaing mararamdaman ko. Iyan ay despite all the heartaches I caused our good Lord noong hindi ko Siya inuuna sa buhay ko dahil busy ako kahahanap ng love life na inaasam ko simula’t sapul magdalaga ako. Dalawang taon kong binuo ‘yung pira-pirasong “peg” ng puso ko. Dati-rati, hindi maaaring wala akong boyfriend nang matagal dahil sa kanila ko inaasa ‘yung pagmamahal na “kaya ko” naman palang ibigay sa sarili ko. “Kaya ko” na dahil pinuno na ako ng pagmamahal ng Diyos; siksik, liglig, at umaapaw pa. Naging sapat na para sa akin ‘yung pagmamahal ng pamilya at mga kaibigan ko. Sabi ko sa sarili ko, okay na ako kahit hindi ko na makita ‘yang “true love” na ‘yan. Basta’t alam kong mahal ako ni Lord,

#YouAreLoved at #TheFeast I always thought that I was a failure. A mess. A trash. Wala akong maalala na nakipag-usap ako kay Lord para sabihing, "Lord, thank You kasi buhay pa ‘ko." Ang sinasabi ko palagi, "Lord, bakit nandito pa ‘ko?" I always blamed Him for what was happening to me. "If You are really there, why has my life turned this way? BAKIT AKO?!!!" TRASH LIFE Hindi ko na kasi alam that time kung saan ako papunta. I was so lost. I had no permanent work. And my biggest frustration was—I DIDN’T GRADUATE FROM COLLEGE. We have financial problems and all, so I had to work at the age of 17. As much as I wanted to study, I couldn’t oblige my mom. She's a solo parent. My dad died when I was nine years old, and that was when all my struggles started. For many years, I was so heartbroken. Devastated. I had so many regrets that led me to not forgive myself for all the things I had done and not to forgive people in return. I always looked down on myself kasi feeling ko ganon ang tingin sa ‘kin ng lahat ng tao. I hated life. And I hated God for not answering my prayers. My selfish prayers. GOD KNOCKING That August 2015 when I first attended the Feast, someone gave me a sign-up form with a list of ministries I could join. My heart beat fast when I saw the Music Ministry. Mahilig kasi akong kumanta, pero ‘di ko ginagamit. ‘Di ako nagjo-join ng contest and all. Mahiyain kasi akong tao. (Pero ‘di halata. Hahaha.) But instead of signing up, I wrote something at the back of that paper: “In time. I promise.” Kasi nahihiya pa ‘ko kay Lord that time. Sabi ko gusto ko muna Siyang makilala. Gusto kong humarap at mag-serve sa Kaniya kapag buo na ‘ko. Nahihiya akong humarap sa Kaniya na hindi pa naman ganon kalalim ‘yung relationship ko with Him. April 2016. I randomly met a friend whom I haven’t seen for six years. I thought it would be a normal chikahan, but it was not. Really not because WE PRAYED. She prayed for me. And I was like, "Lord, is this You?" I felt Him in that moment, in that place, in that person. So after that day, nag-message ako sa page ng Feast dito sa amin on how to join. After a week na wala pa ring reply from them, I followed up. Hindi ko alam saan ako nakakuha ng lakas ng loob para mag-follow up, kung anong nagpu-push sa ‘kin; pero ang alam ko, gusto ko na Siyang pagsilbihan. Gusto ko nang i-surrender ‘yung life ko sa Kaniya. Then the audition day came. Sobrang kaba, as in super kaba levels! It was my first time to audition sa isang choir. I sang Touch the Sky by Hillsong. It was the first ever song that I heard from the Feast na sobrang tumatak sa puso ko. And yes, natanggap

#YouAreLoved at #TheFeast I remember the first time I saw Tita Teng after she arrived from abroad. She had a very thin body that her skin almost clung to her bones. Yet, her belly was immensely bloated as if she was nine-month pregnant with twins. My tita was diagnosed with an ovarian cancer last year. Three doctors in the Middle East already refused to operate on her because she had only one in four chances of surviving. She decided to come back here in the Philippines to continue her medications, and maybe, to spend more time with us. I am especially close to her since she was the one who took care of me when I was young. I have many fond memories of her pampering me, doing everything to give me what I wanted, and supporting my decisions. Sadly, the tables had been turned, and she was then the one who needed care. It pained me to see a loved one in excruciating pain. And it was too difficult to accept that she had a very slim chance of surviving. However, the grace of God was upon her. Her boss in the Middle East helped by giving her allowance for her operation. Then, she was finally accepted to be operated on in a prominent hospital in Manila. Through the help of some generous people around her, she was granted a 100 percent discount on her bill. We thought it was all settled, but her doctor said she needed to stabilize her thyroid before getting an operation. She asked for our prayers because she believed that the best vitamin she could ever receive or take is Vitamin P—“Prayer.” And we indeed interceded for her. A text brigade was started to pray for her every three o’clock in the afternoon. She was also being prayed over after every Feast session by our Feast district builder. We kept on praying for months, but the thyroid remained unstable. Her tumor kept on getting bigger, and she kept on getting thinner. As our prayers continued, her illness kept on getting worse. Despite all these, I never saw the light of faith and hope leave tita’s face. And then I realized, my faith changed, too. In every smile she made, in every positive words she said, and in every hope she showed, my trust in God grew. Even in her affliction, Tita Teng remained my pillar of strength and my inspiration of faith. After months of constantly praying, she was finally approved for operation. I remember her saying, “I was refused by three doctors, but my greatest doctor—God—said that He will heal me. He will never fail me. He will save me.” And she was indeed saved and healed by God. Through Vitamin P, which we all supplied, and through God’s grace, my Tita Teng is now cancer-free! God never ceases to amaze me with His miraculous deeds.  Just like what Tita Teng did, we only need to put our trust in Him and remember that

#YouAreLoved at #TheFeast Just like so many girls out there, I used to crowd my thoughts with daydreams of my own fairy tale, of my “ideal husband.” For someone so idealistic though, my love story is not as romantic as I imagined it to be. There are no remarkable courtship milestones, no spectacular and notable heartwarming memories, neither are we romantically compatible. Everything seems so plain and simple. But Reb—my one true prince—came to my rescue at the most unexpected time and manner. AWAKENING AND RECOGNIZING MY PRINCE All throughout my soul-searching stage, I wondered how it would be like to know you have met “The One.” After a series of heartaches, I had lost belief in relationships thinking all hope was gone, as if finding love was a "failed mission." I even called that time of my life "my dark age." But it was that "dark age" that made me realize I had gone astray and had forgotten I have a kind, consoling father to trust and lean on: God. So there I was one day in the shower, pouring my heart out, not just crying but bawling like a child, tired, and had given up, when I remembered to pray. Again. Yes. In the shower. It was my awakening moment. As soon as I got out, I decided I needed a new life. Ironically, Reb had been in the background all along. Working overseas, I had known him as one of the first few Pinoys I met in the Cayman Islands but never got an opportunity to be close with. Until that day I approached him five years later to ask how I could join their community. He was actively involved in a ministry for singles, and I was like a lost sheep trying to find its way home. I asked him what I needed to bring with me when I attend the Life in the Spirit Seminar (LSS), and his answer stunned me: "Just your complete surrender." For a hungry soul, those words were very comforting. So deep it nailed me through the heart. It is what we consider to this day our first romantic conversation. LSS came and Reb was not as friendly and charming as I thought he would be. He totally snubbed me and showed no interest to get closer to me. (Later on, he revealed to me that his intention was to give me enough space and a chance to be completely immersed in the moment. And so that I could mingle with other people.) Until one fateful day. For some weird reason we became the "apple of the eye" in a breakfast gathering we attended. With no clue what was coming to us, our community brothers and sisters paired us to their heart's delight and teased us all morning. Like teenagers, we blushed, rode along, and innocently laughed with them. Few days after that, Reb and I had more opportunities to engage in casual talks. But already with an element of wonder that